TOTS ONLY: Supporting Families with Young Children

When very young children experience the death of a parent, grief often shows up in ways that can feel confusing or overwhelming for the adults caring for them. Questions repeat. Play becomes a language. Big feelings surface in small, unexpected moments.

TOTS Only was created in response to a growing need we were seeing at The Children’s Room: more families with children in pre-K and Kindergarten seeking grief support that felt developmentally appropriate, emotionally safe, and accessible, especially on weekends.

“With young children, grief often shows up through play, questions, repetition, and in ways that highlight their concrete thinking,” shares Program Coordinator Caitlin Pilette. “This group gives families the tools and the space to navigate those moments with more confidence and in less isolation.”

Meeting Families Where They Are

From a developmental perspective, early childhood is a critical time to offer support. Young children are concrete thinkers. They ask honest, direct questions, often repeating them, as they try to understand what has happened. Caregivers frequently find themselves wondering how to explain something so complex to a four- or five-year-old, while managing their own grief at the same time.

TOTS only creates space for these moments. It allows caregivers to normalize questions like “When is Daddy coming back?” and to release the pressure to have all the answers or to carry the responsibility of remembering the person who died on their own.

“This group matters because it meets families at a moment when everything can feel overwhelming,” says Jen Noonan, Program Director for Center-based Services. “It supports young children in ways they can understand, while giving caregivers language, community, and reassurance that they don’t have to carry their grief alone.”

Creating Space for Connection and Relief

Creating this group felt essential. It ensures that families with very young children are not overlooked and that early loss does not have to be navigated alone.

For children, this group offers an age-appropriate space for expression, memory, and connection. For caregivers, it offers reassurance to know their child is being supported, alongside moments of shared understanding and community.

Learn more about our services here or contact us with any questions. We’re here to help.