“After Kim died, Max would go into the living room where his mom’s hospital bed had been and ask, ‘Where’s Mommy?’”
These are the words of Long Tran, who came to The Children’s Room with his 6-year-old son, Max, a year and a half after Max’s mother Kim, died of cancer. For Max, his mom’s absence was confusing and painful. He would sit quietly, not talking about her, and Long struggled with how and when to bring her up in conversation. Long, like many grieving parents, felt torn—overwhelmed by his own grief while trying to support Max as he navigated his own.
“There were a lot of times when I wasn’t fully present because I was dealing with grief,” Long recalls. “Max would need something, and I’d delay my reaction or be preoccupied. I think he felt that. Sometimes, he’d try harder to get my attention.”
Long realized the deep impact grief was having not only on him but also on Max. As time went on, friends and family who initially provided support began to fade away, leaving Long and Max to pick up the pieces on their own. Long reflects on the challenges of being both a father and a grieving spouse: “I hadn’t fully recognized that I had to wear both hats. It’s been a tough transition.”
The Power of Support
Without support, families like Long and Max face enormous emotional challenges. Children and their parents or caregivers who are grieving are often left to manage their feelings of isolation, depression, and anxiety alone. But The Children’s Room filled that gap for Long and Max. Through our programs, Max began expressing his grief in ways that allowed him to hold onto positive memories of his mom.
“Max hadn’t drawn or colored anything about Kim or our family, but he started drawing more pictures of us,” Long says. “He’d draw our red house, me and him in Minecraft shirts—but he always included Kim. I never would have thought to encourage him to do that…These memories are painful for me, but Max can look at them positively. If he can remember his mom joyfully, why can’t I?”
For Long, The Children’s Room also provided a breakthrough: “At first, I came to the group thinking I was in a good place, just going through the motions. But I realized I had shut down my feelings to keep moving forward. This space allowed me to open that door again, to feel the grief I’d been pushing away, and to share those feelings with others.”
A Place of Connection and Hope
At The Children’s Room, no child, teen, or family grieves alone. We create a safe and supportive space for children, teens, parents, and caregivers to process their emotions, connect with others who share similar experiences, and find hope for the future.
With your support, we can continue to provide these critical services at no cost to grieving families. Your generosity helps us expand our programs, offering additional support groups for children and teens and bringing our services into schools.
For families like Long and Max, your donation can be life-changing. Long describes The Children’s Room as “an amazing resource for anyone with a child who has lost a parent or sibling. It’s okay to talk about death here. You realize you’re not suffering alone—you see hope in others who have walked this path before you.”
How You Can Help
We need your support to ensure that families like Long and Max continue to receive the care and guidance they need to heal and move forward. Will you consider making a donation by December 31st? Your gift will provide a lifeline to grieving families, offering them the support they need to heal.
Together, we can ensure that no child, teen, or family has to grieve alone.
